Hayibo.com - Zuma love child: Berlusconi lauds JZ, asks after mistresses' sister

Zuma love child: Berlusconi lauds JZ, asks after mistresses' sister

TSHWANE. Russian Prime minister Vladimir 'The Body' Putin has issued a statement expressing solidarity and manly fist-bumps with Jacob Zuma over revelations of the South African president’s most recent sex scandal. His Italian counterpart, Silvio Berlusconi, has reportedly also made contact with Zuma to ask if his latest mistress has a sister.

Since news of Zuma’s new love-child broke on Sunday, the president’s penis has caused a national uproar.

The government has been doing its best to keep it under wraps, but opposition parties have been leaping on it with glee.

Many ANC stalwarts have made public statements in support of Jacob Zuma including Youth League spokesperson Floyd Shivambu who did a 180 on last year’s statement that ‘sleeping around is sleeping is around’.

But now it seems that Zuma also has the support of at least two major world leaders.

In a phone call to Zuma’s office in the Union Buildings yesterday, Italian Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi congratulated Zuma on his latest conquest and advised him to ignore the home-wreckers in the media and opposition politicians, whom he described as “cock-blockers.”

Interviewed on the steps of one of his private Sicilian orgy mansions, Berlusconi confirmed the phone call and added, "My best wishes to Zuma! The great thing about having a daughter is that in 18 years, you can hit on her friends!

"Or even earlier if we can get the law changed."

Berlusconi would neither confirm nor deny rumours that he had asked whether the future Mrs Zuma IV had a sister.

Meanwhile Vladimir Putin, who is notorious for posing topless for press photos and stacking his cabinet with politically flexible ballerinas, sent an official letter of support to the South African president’s office.

The letter, which was published on the Russian Embassy website, read: "We are liking to welcome Jacob Zuma to be joining world’s most unbuttoned presidents club."

The statement was later corrected to read "world’s studliest presidents club".

Putin’s minister of communications, former pole-dancer Friski Bendova explained that it was a translation error.

"In Russia, these words are very close, like beloved president’s hand to inside of my panties," she said.