Hayibo.com - More lies as Carl Niehaus admits he is divorced mother of four

More lies as Carl Niehaus admits he is divorced mother of four

PRETORIA. Disgraced former ANC spokesman Carl Niehaus admitted to yet more lies this morning, just hours after media claims that some of his qualifications had been faked. Speaking to journalists from inside the cardboard box he now calls home, Niehaus confessed that he is in fact Hestrie van Tonder, a 52-year-old divorced mother of four from Boksburg.

Niehaus' revelations have dominated national headlines this week, as first his financial dealings and then his tertiary qualifications were exposed.

The ANC has reportedly put pressure on Niehaus to provide full disclosure after the party became unsettled by claims he was making around the office that he had once wrestled a grizzly bear to death while making love to identical Swedish sextuplets.

"It sounded unlikely," said ANC spokesman Cremora Khumalo. "Four Swedish twins and a koala bear, perhaps. Maybe three and some sort of wolverine or badger if he'd warmed up properly beforehand. But not all six plus the grizzly."

He said the claims had been discussed at Cabinet level and the party had felt that with Julius Malema in government there was only room for one senior party member to be making "completely insane assertions", and so Niehaus was asked to disclose everything.

According to Khumalo, Niehaus had torn off his clothes, revealing a slightly stained petticoat and brazier, and had rushed from the room in tears.

Journalists tracked down Niehaus this morning sitting in a cardboard box outside the mansion he is being evicted from. It was there that he confessed to being Hestrie van Tonder, a 52-year-old divorced mother of four from Boksburg.

"I just wanted to do right by my kids," she sobbed. "At first it was just little white lies so I could pay the rent. I told people I had a diploma from a typing college, stuff like that."

But she said the lies quickly spiraled out of control.

"Soon I would go to an interview for a temporary secretarial post and they'd ask me if I could work a switchboard, and I'd say yes, because I had been the South African ambassador to the Netherlands, and they'd say 'Sjoe!' and I'd get the job."

Asked why she had claimed to have a Doctorate in Theology from the University of Utrecht, Van Tonder said she had once accidentally blasphemed during an interview.

"I was applying for a job at Crazy Solly's Pink Bubble Laundry there by the dog track, and I touched a hot iron and I took the Lord's name in vain.

"Crazy Solly said he didn't like blasphemy, and I said, 'No, it's okay because I'm a professional, I've got a Doctorate in Theology from Utrecht', and Crazy Solly said, 'Shit a brick!' and gave me the job.

"It just sort of stuck."

Asked how she had gone from working in a laundry to being a senior figure in the ANC, she explained that doing dry-cleaning and being an ANC spokesman were "basically the same job".

"They bring you dirty laundry, you make the dirt go away, and they pay you in cash," she said.

"You never ask questions, you never make eye contact. Just work the machine, take the money, and do right by your kids."